Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step at a Time

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Writer: Marcy Cruz | “Clothes aren’t going to change the world, the women who wear them will.” ~ Anne Klein

Last weekend, while shooting some blog pictures, I finally had to accept something. I cannot wear heels. I’m a flats girl. And I realized that, that’s okay.

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Dress & Clutch – Avenue, Shoes – Lane Bryant

This may not seem like an earth shattering moment to you but for me, it was!

It was yet another step forward in me embracing who I am, no matter what anyone says.

I have heard so many times how wearing heels will elongate my legs, make me look more age appropriate and more sexy and confident.

But as I stood there in pain, smiling as my friend took my pictures, I thought to myself, “Why and who am I doing this for?” As a blogger, I feel that pressure to always up my game so that I can be seen and stand out from the rest. I revel in my differences and am not afraid to put myself out there. However, I realized I was trying too hard to please the masses and not please myself.

I got lost in the idea of wearing heels because of how they looked on other women and listening to what others thought I should wear.

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Dress – Igigi, Shoes – fullbeauty, Clutch – Torrid

We all hear what people deem to be “helpful” advice on what we should wear. As a single woman on the dating scene, I hear men often say they love a woman in heels. When I go to work, shooting at Gwynnie Bee for my First Fit Reviews, I see the other models wearing heels with ease and looking so gorgeous. I yearn to feel that way in heels. But for me, it is not so glamorous.

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Top – On the Plus Side

I have had foot problems for as long as I could remember. I have flat feet and fallen arches. As a result of that, I always have foot pain. Flats and sneakers have always been more comfortable for me. But when I would go to events, I would see women wearing heels and I would sometimes feel inadequate.

Not being able to wear heels made me feel less feminine.

It’s amazing how something as simple as a shoe style can affect your attitude towards dressing and embracing yourself. I was essentially styling my life for others and not myself.

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Entire look – Catherines

Here I was, in pain, wearing heels in pictures for my blog, when honestly, it’s not really who I am. I don’t wear heels in real life. I wish I could but the pain… it’s not happening.

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Entire look – Catherines

It’s so easy to compare ourselves to others and try to emulate them. And it is so easy to get caught up in these fashion rules and gender stereotypes that “tell” us how we should be, act or dress.

Heels do not define who I am as a woman. They certainly don’t determine my worth as a stylish woman or an amazing person. They don’t define my beauty or spirit.

Marcy Cruz "Learning to Embrace Yourself One Step At a Time" On the Plus Side

Top, jeans, boots – Avenue, Jacket – Lane Bryant, Clutch – Fashion to Figure

There is only one you in the world and that’s pretty amazing. So it was time for me to remind myself of that.

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Marcy Cruz
A former website merchandising manager for a plus size catalog retailer and a traveler, writer and fashion lover by heart, Marcy’s goal has always been to inspire women everywhere through fashion, travel and her own fearless moments in life. So she decided that her love for writing was the best way to help empower plus size women to live life fearlessly. In 2012, she had a short story about her travels as a plus size woman, published in the book: Hot and Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion. She has also written for various online publications, such as Madison Plus, Goddess Magazine and Belle-Noir Magazine, where she had her own weekly blog column called Fearless Fridays. She is presently the Blog Editor for PLUS Model Magazine, the #1 virtual magazine for plus size women.

Read more about Marcy!

About Marcy Cruz

A former website merchandising manager for a plus size catalog retailer and a traveler, writer and fashion lover by heart, Marcy’s goal has always been to inspire women everywhere through fashion, travel and her own fearless moments in life. So she decided that her love for writing was the best way to help empower plus size women to live life fearlessly. In 2012, she had a short story about her travels as a plus size woman, published in the book: Hot and Heavy: Fierce Fat Girls on Life, Love and Fashion. She has also written for various online publications, such as Madison Plus, Goddess Magazine and Belle-Noir Magazine, where she had her own weekly blog column called Fearless Fridays. She is presently the Blog Editor for PLUS Model Magazine, the #1 virtual magazine for plus size women. Read more about Marcy!

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